Having Kids Will Bring You Closer

The saying "having kids will bring you closer" is without a doubt one of the most untrue statements I have ever heard. I do not have any children that I know of (just kidding...kind of), so I can't base my proof on that. However, I do have proof and personal experience to back it up, my parents.

Let me start off by saying that I love my parents very much. They aren't perfect but who is. I am not one of those people that hated his or her parents for lack of attention or too much discipline. My parents were in many ways great, just not for each other.

My parents were married when they had me, then divorced when I was 2-years-old. According to my mom, my dad cheated on her, but who knows the real truth. My mom tends to exaggerate, even about stuff like that.

They remarried before they had my brother Jacob, I was 5. We were doing all right for a while. We even went to Disney Land! It was probably the most enjoyable vacation we had as a family. I had so much fun, I cried when we had to leave.

Times got tough between the two of them, but at that point in time, they didn't let it affect me. They were fighting a lot, but they tried to hide it around the family and my friends. I remember constantly inviting friends over to stay the night so my parents would at least pretend to like each other. When I had a friend over, my mom would try to be the cool mom and let us rent "rated R" movies, stay up late exploring in the backyard, and whatever else came to mind.

Then my second and last brother was born, Ben. He was the third boy to be member of the family. It was a good time, for a little while. The fighting got worse between my parents after Ben could handle himself. It was getting to the point that I didn't want to stay at my house anymore or invite friends over. I just wanted to get out of there.

Out of what seemed to be desperation, something I realized at 12-years-old, my parents told me and Jacob that they were having another baby. I was thinking, "again...Really?" I was just shocked that they had decided to break their system of waiting five years to have another child. My brothers and I were five years apart. I mean, I thought the three of us, me, Jacob and Ben were going to be it. Don't get me wrong, I was happy that I would have another brother, or even a sister, it was just obvious to me that they were having the baby out of desperation.

My sister Mary was born, my first sister and last sibling. She is probably the coolest and funniest of all of us siblings. She reminds me a lot of myself, always cracking a joke or laughing about something. She is a sweet person and truly fun to be around, even with our age difference. I am 12 years older than her.

Mary coming into the family, being the great little girl that she is, didn't patch things up between my parents. It was getting unbearable. After a couple years since Mary had been born, the living situation was getting unbearable. My parents were constantly separating and getting back together, they were acting like a middle school couple.

Then the day finally came and not a moment too soon. My parents had announced to me and Jacob that they were getting a divorce. Jacob and I looked at each other with the expression that read, "it's about time."

My parents went through the usual freak-out steps that divorced parents do. I went to counseling and had to answer the constant question, "How do you feel about your parents divorce? You know it's not your fault right?"

I knew it wasn't my fault. They screamed at each other constantly over their own stubborness, and whenever the fight was over, Jacob and I received all of the frustration from the fight. It was a miserable time for a child to live through. I can't imagine putting my kid through something like that.

My parents are happy now for the most part. They even show respect for one another half of the time. There was an incident between the two of them in the west Little Rock Taco Bueno this past fall, after my brother Ben's football game, but no one was arrested or injured. So things are getting better.

I am proud of my family and where I came from because I know they did the best they could to raise us. My parents are good people and have worked hard to provide their children with everything they need to succeed in life. They were right for us, just not right for each other. I am at least glad that I can learn from their mistakes.